On my first mother’s day as a mom I finally understood all the fuss around it. You never realize why mothers need all that acknowledgment until you, yourself, become one.
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When I was pregnant with my first child I recall the mothers’ faces around me in my baby shower, gazing with what seemed a strange joy and empathy (I now know they were all thinking to themselves: welcome to our world!). All the excitement began to have a lot of sense once my little one popped out. I’m sure if you have children of your own, you know what I’m talking about: being a mother changes you more than anything ever before in your life.
So, on this special occasion, and in these challenging lockdown circumstances, where we are all being 24/7 mothers, I would like to breathe in and out (for sanity’s sake), and share with you my top 5 reasons why being a mom has fulfilled my life.
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1. Unconditional love
Overly trite, and a million times heard before: you have never loved anyone unconditionally in your life, until you have a baby. I like the romantic feeling of it, but I’m sure this has more to do with Biology and our genes’ survival on earth, than with us being suddenly able to love without expecting anything in return. When you have children, you could literally give your life up so nothing happens to them. I love mine so much, that my heart physically hurts sometimes.
2. Life purpose
Children give a lot of meaning to your life. I’m not saying other things don’t, but in my personal experience, this is a project that’s worth all efforts. I have never met a mother who said she regrets all the time spent with her children or the attentiveness given to their upraising and education. They comprise a never-ending reason for trying better again, and again, and again… every day.
3. Personal insight
Children come accessorized with a gigantic mirror that gives you the chance to look at your reflection, and become aware of your greatest areas of personal improvement (your demons, if you will). If you pay attention, as well known author Shefali Tsabary says, “the child is never the problem; it’s always the parent’s inability to meet the child’s needs that is”. This has been so true to me. Every time I face a new challenge with my children, I painfully discover something to work on myself: a fear, a lack, an unresolved emotion, and so on. I almost always end up feeling grateful for this brand new information, and for me having to start all over again in my personal growth process.
4. Teachers of patience
The day your little pea is born, you have got yourself a coach in patience for life. If you are looking to work on this skill, there’s no better formula than becoming a parent. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a mom, but when talking about making you lose your temper, kids know all about it. They give you endless opportunities to develop this important virtue.
5. Here and now
Being present is by far the greatest lesson my children have taught me. I’m convinced that peace, growth, love, are all in the present moment and only in it. It has always been a huge challenge for me to live in the now, constantly looking back at experiences and feelings, or looking forward to becoming or achieving. My kids are my top one reminder of how being in the present, as they are all the time, opens a world full of awe, joy, and endless possibilities.
So, all this being said, this quarantine has truly been a test for me as a mom. I’m sure a lot of you are with me on the same boat. Thus before finishing this post, I would like to raise a glass for all the mothers out there, doing the best they can every day in guiding these little but majestic spiritual beings throughout their life-path.
About the Author
Part of the Xinalani family, Andrea is fond of yoga and meditation. She’s mother of two and passionate about language and words. She has a degree in Creative Writing and loves sharing new ideas and deep insights in a fun prêt-à-porter way.
